The group is hanging out at the Church of Noir when a high ranking member of the Town Guard enters and asks to speak to Wurm. He explains that his name is Gabriel and was told by Yo-Soon (the Anti-paladin) that Wurm and his companions might be able to help him with a delicate situation. Gabriel explains that his daughter Emma was brutally raped by a rich merchant who is in town, with his large ship docked at the pier. Emma is in bad shape and is fighting for her life. He asks the group to kill the merchant, but before his death he wants to makes sure his penis is removed. He gives the group a set of glasses to wear during the event so he can scry magically from a distance to watch. Being a prominent member of the Town guard, he cannot participate, but ensures the group that the rest of his men are aware and will not interfere with the event.
Randy Applebottom's eyes light up and eagerly accepts and puts on the glasses. The group stages a diversion for the ship's henchmen with the Bard playing on the dock, encouraging all to join. A successful diversion and intense performance by Mordilane (bard) allows Randy to get onboard and into the lower levels of the ship without notice.
Randy finds the merchant (Louis Farboat) in his master suite in the process of raping yet another young girl tied to his bed. Randy overtakes the merchant and rapes him to his surprise. While being raped and screaming for help, Randy cuts his penis off and stuffs it into his mouth.
They rescue the girl and kill the merchant. Town guards all around give an approving nod thereafter.
Unfortunately, Emma succumbs to her wounds and dies. She was never able to have the knowledge that her rapist was properly violated himself and then killed.
still dead, not here yet
ReplyDeleteRandy does not feel this synopsis does his murder of the rapist merchant justice. Randy feels like it would be best not to neglect his accomplishments in the future to avoid finding one's self on the opposite side of his new toy.
ReplyDeleteMuch better now.
ReplyDeleteThis was a nice offer from the town guard. It is nice being respected by your community for the services we can offer it. I'm not a father, but I would want this to be done on my child's behalf, plus it offers solice to the family. I would have liked to have done surgery but Randy had his heart set on this; plus I didn't think he would have been so clean with his...approach. I'm proud of the group as we pulled together, successfully, and garnered respect from the guards. And now Randy has also pledged his love of Noir. Noir be praised and bless this group until the end of their days!
ReplyDeletePraise Noir!!!!!
ReplyDeleteDear Diary, As I practiced my forms today I reflected on the actions of the halfbreed. He tried to kill me, but why? Because he is not pure? He does not accept his place in the world? Maybe because he can't find traps, Maybe he doesn't like how I refer to him? But I call it as I see it after all he is a halfbreed I am not wrong. He should be taught a lesson. But I must prepare, he is predictable but does pose a small threat. I must stay alert.
ReplyDeleteI had thought this elf to be just a jealous, lonely seething cunt who for some reason takes out his inadequacies on a stranger, but now he acts as if he is a victim that had not intentionally insulted be at every opportunity. At first I though he was trying to be clever and manipulate the situation, but in fact, I am starting to feel sorry for him for he is quite daft. Which might explain the bigotry. He is, in simplest terms an idiot. Only a total idiot can be that arrogant.
ReplyDeleteAll in all, I think it would be nice to try to bury the hatchet, for in battle people are focused on his flamboyant swords they never see me coming. Yet, it still wouldn't make up for his redundancy and liability to the group.
He insists on leading, making decisions, barking out orders and being our spokesman. The priest is too busy converting people to care to notice that the elf has no people skills what so ever and lacks common sense. Completely impulsive, told a minitour to fetch a friends wife, starts bullying the towns homeless, which is not always the best idea. He practically bum rushes a shell shocked girl and expects a good reaction. First thing he says to a guy back from the dead, "der, how'd you die?". Just tactless. Fucking with me in itself, objectively is a truly stupid idea. He will do all this dumb crap and have the nerve to continue acting like he is better than me, insulting me and mine, and in a nasty way. Then he gets all hurt when I react in kind, but I do so in a kind fashion. This is the DBC after all, he should be dead in the gutter with his mouth.
It's not like i haven't tried to explain, he is just dumb or has a death wish. He already thinks I am trying to kill him, lol. There is no try, only do. But he will need to learn his role, and it is not speaking when there is a Bard, a Mage, a priest and yours truly present.
With Applebottom and the Gourde, we have no need of a control freak moron who likes to press the buttons of all he meets. I was hoping it was he who had me jumped, I was liking the anger, but hes far too stupid for that...not that that would be the best of ideas. He's not worth my wrath, but he needs to stay in the dumb thug lane before it costs us all. I might have a real foe to worry about, the thieves guild.